A Spontaneous Kundalini Rising Experience

What is the Kundalini?

The Kundalini is an Eastern term to describe the awakening of a spiritual force brought on by an expansion of consciousness into higher levels of awareness. Often described as a coiled energy located at the base of the spine, the Kundalini can awaken gradually after years of spiritual focus, during a deep meditative practice, or as a spontaneous event.

Many serious spiritual or religious practitioners may never experience the Kundalini rising, as it is a process that requires many lifetimes of practice and must be in alignment with what we are to achieve spiritually or to teach in this lifetime. And not everyone’s life path will include the awakening of the Kundalini, as we all bring forth different energies and have varying purposes, much like the masters did, whose teachings all came through with a different slant and audience.

In the Eastern practices, attempts at Kundalini rising is a serious matter, and the tools are only offered to serious students of meditation and self-cleansing. A mentor is always involved. A spontaneous awakening of the Kundalini can be frightening. Around 2002, when I was working on acknowledging and releasing my unconscious influences and boldly making statements to Spirit, I had a frightening experience that was later explained to me as a spontaneous rising of the Kundalini.

My Kundalini Rising Experience

In my effort to find my empowerment and reach for qualities I knew were latent in me, I made a list (a common recommendation) of who I wanted to be in life. My list filled two lined sheets of paper including empowering comments like, “I want to feel joy in all that I do,” “I want to release what is holding me from my full potential and find my life purpose,” and “I want to be patient and loving toward my children.” Some statements were general while others were more detailed. I also included some things I wanted in life.

One morning sitting on the floor after my meditation, I took out the list and read it loudly and fearlessly proclaiming to the Universe all that I wanted to be and do. Just as I finished, I sensed an energy surge through my upper back and up my neck, and then felt something like the head of a snake reach into my head. This was so powerful and I was so unprepared for it that I fell to the ground and lay there, bewildered for a while. It scared the living daylights out of me because I had no idea what I had experienced as I was not engaging in (and still do not engage) in very esoteric practices. I tried to call my mentor but could not reach him. After a while I got up and took it easy for the afternoon, but the effect of this experience stayed with me for quite some time. In fact, I think it shook me out of my propensity for a crazy, chaotic life. My attitude about life changed around that time.

Powerful Spiritual Practices Require Guidance

Any powerful spiritual practice, such as raising the Kundalini or doing the lessons of A Course in Miracles, need to be given appropriate consideration. Although seemingly simple from an outside perspective, as there are no physical signs that anything is changing, they evoke potent spiritual forces that aim to undo the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us. This can have at least a temporary destabilizing effect. Unseen universal forces are very powerful. This is why it is suggested we engage gurus, mentors, or other spiritual teachers when undertaking a spiritual journey.

Other religious practices, such as receiving the Holy Spirit in Christianity, are given proper consideration, as a priest or minister oversees the process. I was once witness to a ceremony to receive the Holy Spirit. The participant was asked whether she wanted to invite the Holy Spirit in, and the attending minister made the request, saying that she was prepared and ready to receive. While making a gentle gesture over her head, he asked that the Holy Spirit calmly come upon her.

Many yogis and teachers of meditation and yoga believe we should not attempt to raise the Kundalini—that it should not be awakened. They believe that we came into this world with it closed and that awakening it is an intense esoteric practice that can have detrimental effects, as some may have difficulty getting along in the world afterward.

This article/blog post is an expansion to sub-section “The Kundalini” from the section “Concepts” in chapter 6, “Words, Symbols, Rituals, Concepts, and Prayers” of my book Your Journey to Peace, Bridging the Gap Between Religion, Spirituality, Psychology, and  Science.  The chapter titles are listed in the “Book Synopsis” found at: https://yourjourneytopeace.com/book-synopsis/

Rosemary McCarthy, October 2016, updated January 2018

You can access other articles on various subjects related to our personal, collective, and cosmic journeys) on my blog at: https://yourjourneytopeace.com/blog/

Available in print and e-book formats; you can buy it through this link to the various booksellers: https://yourjourneytopeace.com/the-book-store/

To read or sign up for my newsletter see: https://mailchi.mp/ed1320188338/welcome-to-your-journey-to-peace

Following the book’s Facebook page ensures you receive new articles as soon as they are posted. The link is at the bottom of this page.

You can share this article as long as you include the full copyright message below. If you share through Facebook  (link is below), the message will automatically copy.

——————-

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. However, I would appreciate if you would inform me of where or to whom it has been shared, using email rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

 

Points to Staying on the Good Path / Keeping the Process Going

There are many important points to remember and tools we can adopt to keep us on track to finding our Best Self.

Observe Chosen Practice(s) to Align to Your True Self

If you find yourself slipping into old negative feelings, attitudes, or behaviors, bumping up your practice, reading, rereading, or listening to uplifting or spiritual material will strengthen your resolve and uplift you.

Develop a Short Aligning Practice

Short thirty second to one-minute practices repeated many times a day can calm you and help connect you to joy―important elements in accessing your True Self and becoming your Best Self. And these need not be formal or esoteric.

We can simply take a few moments and breathe in and out deeply, appreciate something that brings us peace like a majestic tree, beautiful garden, or sparkling lake, the beautiful view from atop a tee at the golf course, or simply gazing at fish swimming in their tank.

Tap Into the Love and Joy Within

Finding and embracing love, beauty, and joy in everything we see and do keeps our connection to our True Self and to the Universe open and strong. It is our raison d’être. In A Thousand Names For Joy, Byron Katie tells us that when she picks up, feeds, and wipes her granddaughter’s face “I do this not only for me, but to me as well.” (1)

(This article/blog post is based on concepts in my book Your Journey to Peace, Bridging the Gap Between Religion, Spirituality, Psychology, and Science. Book Synopsis is found here).

Archetypes Act As Conduits to Help Us, and to Strengthen Latent Qualities Within Us

Keep Releasing Sessions Light

Releasing what is blocking us from becoming our Best Self is vital. However, we must remember that once our releasing session is over, we need to forget about what may have come up so that the healing can happen within our unconscious. Spirit will look after the details of our internal healing.

Self-examination is not about getting stuck in the details and muck of our old stories; nor is it about amassing more shame or guilt over what we have or have not done. We must not over-analyze or wallow in our pasts—do not get stuck in the darkness.

Should you find yourself falling into the trap remind yourself that recognizing you have is a big and positive step, and then simply forgive yourself. Years of conditioning cannot be immediately undone, but it is not as big a climb as we may think.

Being Present; Living in the Now

The importance of living in the present, or in the Now, is based upon the fact that the past is the past and at that time, it was experienced in the Now. The future will also be experienced in the Now. When we attune to the experience at hand and revel in every moment as it unfolds, we will discover the joy of just being.

Stay Mindful

Continue to practice conscious mindfulness to remain aware of when you are aligned or misaligned from your True Self. We can use the observing-ego technique to step back and assess how we are being at the moment, or we can journal to trace how we navigated life that day. These practices help us become aware of how we were misaligned from our True Self, so that we can adjust our attitudes if necessary.

Practicing Nonresistance; Loving what Is

Nonresistance to and allowing what is without resisting it are vital to finding peace of mind.

Byron Katie expresses the notion of nonresistance by suggesting the importance of loving what is, also the title of one of her books, and it is within the neutrality of its allowing, with no judgment or resistance, that we find inner peace.

Resistance, the antithesis to nonresistance, requires energy. In A New Earth, Eckhart Tolle explains, “Resistance endows the world and the ego with a heaviness and an absolute importance that makes you take yourself and the world very seriously … misperceived as a struggle for survival, … it becomes your reality” making life seem hard. (2)

In You Can Heal Your Life, Louise L. Hay suggests we can help ourselves release resistance to events and changes that we may find difficult to accept by telling ourselves:

“I see any resistance patterns within me only as something else to release. They have no power over me. I am the power in my world. I flow with changes taking place in my life as best I can. I approve myself and the way I am changing.” (3)

Dealing with Fear As We Change

Fearful voices from the past or anxiety about the future that surface to our consciousness can be avoided if we remember that we chose to embark on this path because we were looking for a better way.

And Spirit is on board with us as we undertake this sacred work of our journey back to wholeness. Still, changing the inner world we created to protect ourselves can be scary. Inelia Benz’s fear-processing exercise can be helpful. The link is below in the endnotes.” (4)

Find Words to Explain to Those Around Us

Once we embark on a journey to finding peace in our lives the new attitudes, practices, or ways of being we develop may confuse or frighten our friends and family. They may fear our changing will affect them. It is important to let them know that we are working on bettering ourselves.

They still may question us or become sarcastic or critical, and even if they are genuinely concerned for us, their questioning can undermine our efforts.

We may not even be able to understand what is going on with us, so articulating it to others will be even harder, especially under their scrutiny. Carefully choosing words can be helpful.

Words like “I can’t explain exactly what is going on with me, but something is shifting, and I have to figure it out,” or “I need to listen to my current inner urgings” when going through what we don’t even understand is helpful.

So is practicing little phrases in advance. Some people even keep cue cards handy.

Use Visualizations

Visualizations can help us get unstuck from stress, negative influences, or can help reset our mind-set and path. We can ask Spirit or our higher Self to give us one, or we can conjure up our own using a symbol or invoking a deity we are comfortable with. There are a few at the back of the book.

This article is an expansion of section “Points to Staying on the Good Path / Keeping the Process Going” from chapter 4, Along the Way.

Endnotes

(1) Katie, A Thousand Names for Joy, with Stephen Mitchell (New York NY: Three Rivers Press, 2007) 197.

(2) Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose (New York: Plume, 2005), 208-9.

(3) Louise L Hay, You Can Heal Your Life, (Carlsbad, CA: Hay House, 2004) 62.

(4) Inelia Benz, “Inelia Benz: Fear Processing Exercise,” Golden Age of Gaia, posted by Steve Beckow, August 11, 2011,  is found here 

–  Rosemary McCarthy©,  October 2016, updated April, 2018

Click here for my blog page with many articles on our personal, collective, and planetary journeys to peace.

Following the book’s Facebook page ensures you receive new articles/posts as soon they are posted. The link is at the bottom of this page.

Available in print and e-book formats click here to be directed to links to various booksellers, like Amazon, Chapters (Canada) erc.

To sign up for my newsletter email me at: rosemary@yourjourneytopeaee.com 

Click here to read the January issue. Click here to read the February issue. Click here for the March issue.

If you appreciate this article, I invite you to leave a review on the Book’s Website found here or on its Face Book page found here 

You can share this article as long as you include the full copyright message below. If you share through Facebook (a link is below), the message will automatically copy.

 

Below is a peek into a few other concepts in the book:

Improving our attitudes helps change the world, as every shift in attitude affects the vibration of the Planet as a whole. (Introduction)

Our capacity to love others is in direct relationship to how much we love ourselves. (Chapter 3, What We Can Do About It).

We manifest together in our families to help and support each other in life, but at the highest level, our relationships are intended to give us opportunities to work through our unconscious influences. (Chapter 5, Relationships)

Being somewhat enlightened means that we have some awareness of the cause and effect of our thoughts, attitude, and actions, and of our interconnectedness. (Chapter 6, Words, Symbols, Rituals, Concepts, Prayers).

Our need to reconcile what we put upon the Indigenous peoples is in direct relationship to our countrys’ successful advancements. (Chapter 9, The Planet and Abundance)

At levels beyond our awareness we chose to be here at this time of ‘The Shift’ to help bring about our and Gais’s Ascensions. (Chapter 10, Ascension).

—————

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. To copy, share, or distribute this article simply ensure the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. You can contact me at: rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly. Rosemary.

 

Universal Truths and the Masters Messages Come to Us in Many Ways

Portals and Vortexes

Portals and vortexes are energetic openings. Solid forms, such as powerful artifacts like the Arc of the Covenant, megalithic structures like Stonehenge, and high-level energetic stones, crystals, or technologies have been imbued with powerful alchemic energies and act as portals or gateways to other dimensions.

Certain places can also act as strong energetic gateways, and portals can open in areas where a sacred event was held. Places that were once gateways can and have maintained their energetic openings, such as in Machu Picchu. Cosmic alignments also cause gateways to other dimensions to open during certain time frames.

Throughout Humanity’s history portal openings have been given to us so that we can step out of the limited 3rd dimensional awareness we have been stuck in for so long. These openings allow our consciousness to expand.

When in a state of expanded consciousness, we sense, feel, and become aligned with the universal love and Oneness we emerged from, and are still a part of. This helps us attune to our True Self, which motivates us to become our Best Self.

This connection to our True Self allows us to find peace within our self, encourages us to do the things that bring us joy, inspires us to reach for our dreams, and guides to find our soul/life purpose. As we have been attuned to the universal love and Oneness around us, we are able to recognize it in others.

his article/blog post is based in concepts from my book “Your Journey to Peace … “

See here for About Book …  here  to Subscribe to my e-mail list to receive further posts

(More links are below)

Archetypes Act As Conduits to Help Us, and to Strengthen Latent Qualities Within Us

 

Our relationships improve and we experience more harmony in our lives, because we are able to extend the love we have experienced and the compassion and understanding this brings with it to those we come in contact with.

Portals to the higher dimensions are imbued with healing energies. These create impulses in us to release fears, limitations, and what we no longer need to hold onto to feel safe. They allow for new ideas to come through us or to be brought to us.

The energy of portals to the higher dimensions allows what is not of love, within us or about others, to be recognized and acknowledged. We can then deal with what is keeping us from accessing the love within, or love and understanding for others.

Although portals are powerful energetic gateways to the higher dimensions in the Universe, we have  access to any of the 12 levels within the 3rd dimension Humanity has occupied for eons (of the 12 within our Universe).

The vibrational signature of our Life Matrix* (see below for definition) dictates where we reside within our 12 dimensions. However, we can move through the various levels in our lifetime, and even on a daily basis, by the vibrations our thoughts and attitudes create.

Our Energetic Vibration Dictates in Which Dimension We Reside

When we are angry, cruel, unfair, judgmental, lash out at and/or blame or hate others, or are constantly creating chaos around us we are existing within the lower echelons of the 3rd dimension.

When we are contended and life is going our way and is reasonably harmonious, we are existing within the middle levels of the 3rd dimension.

And when we are happy, joyful, perfectly contented, are able to create the life we want, and can extend love and compassion and live harmoniously with others, we are existing on the highest levels of the 3rddimension.

We can live our entire life within the lower levels of the 3rd dimension, at the middle levels, or at the highest levels. And at any point in life we can shift levels, either for a short time, or never return to our previous level.

What we do, what we watch, and who we hang out with can also affect our vibration. Engaging in lower vibration activities, such as aggressive video games, or even witnessing harshness or cruelty on TV can lower our vibration.

Being engaged in higher vibration activities, such a light-hearted gathering with friends or family, listening to beautiful music or an inspiring talk, or watching an uplifting TV show can raise our vibration. So can laughter, prayer, meditation, yoga, etc., or being in nature.

Depending on where our energetic vibrations are from moment to moment, we can even vacillate between different levels within a day.

For example, if we are generally happy and contented but something triggers anger in us and we remain angry and fall into blame, judgment, or revenge scenarios we have tumbled down a few levels.

The reason it is so important to override these or any other negative attitudes and their behaviors is that we can get stuck in the negativity of the lower levels.

Until recently it has not been commonly known or understood that negativity breeds negativity, or that positivity breeds positivity. Our thoughts and attitudes create vibrations and wherever these land us within the dimensions becomes our current set-point.

The lower dimensions are dense and murky and weigh us down emotionally. This makes it harder to be positive. Life seem more difficult existing in the lower levels of the 3rd dimension, partly because of its denseness, but also because our vibrations attract more of the same, so negativity surrounds us. The lower dimensions are also harder to override, as the murkiness holds us down.

The higher dimensions are lighter and energize us. They make it easier to be loving and positive. Life seem easier existing on these higher levels because of their lighter energetic makeup, but also because we attract more positivity around us. And the ease, joy, and lightness of existing in these higher dimensions inspires us to reach to even higher levels.

We Can Create Portals to the Higher Universal Dimensions

Portals, vortexes, or energetic pathways can also be created through a concentration of positive energy during a gathering.

The energy that is created and uplifts us from an inspiring speech, sermon, or spiritual gathering, at a great music concert, the perfect sports move or performance that awes us, or an event that brings us together for a good cause, all create portals or vortexes from the accumulated energy of the participants and spectators.

Through the experiences these bring us we are reminded that our hearts can expand to feel more than what our every-day living allows.

Rick Hansen offers an inspiring example of how the energy created by embracing a higher purpose can move us and expand out heart-opening.

In May 1987, I was in Vancouver the week Hansen was finishing up his eighteen-month Man in Motion World Tour of over thirty countries. His dreams of being an athlete and of an adventurous life abruptly changed at the age of fifteen when he lost the use of his legs in an accident.

After many years of struggling with this new reality, he eventually became fueled by a vision of bringing awareness to and creating better accessibility for those in wheelchairs, and set out on this tour. I didn’t know much at all about him or the details of his trek, but I was in Vancouver as he was to arrive in town on the final leg of the tour, and I stood in the crowd and waited for him to appear.

As he approached, a heightened excitement welled up in me. This surprised me greatly. I had not yet embraced any spiritual concepts or practices that could account for this, but later when I had, I realized that this heart-opening I experienced had come from him and what he had created. Hansen may not have been a religious or spiritual master, but I could certainly sense the uplifting energy that surrounded him.

With his authenticity of purpose, he touched many with his fearlessness, courage, and the awareness he brought to the issues of paraplegics. At the same time his energetic output created a vortex around him that allowed witnesses to experience heart-openings they may not have even been aware they could tap into.

Hard work, determination, and purposeful energetic focusing can also create a vortex. During the 2014 Sochi Olympics, a palpable positive energy was created by the Russian figure skaters. Evgeni Plushenko was the first to skate in a group event, and as soon as the music began, he surged with confident energy.

Throughout the performance, the audience was so silent and captivated you could hear a pin drop: his skating was flawless. Plushenko’s moves were perfectly in step with the music and together this created a perfect rise and fall of sensitivity and intensity, culminating with the music intensifying urging him to a dynamic conclusion.

As the other Russian skaters took to the ice during the same event, they also performed with that perfect combination of energy and confidence. While witnessing this, I thought that these Russian skaters must have had strong guidance individually and as a group to create such positive, uplifting vibrations.

Kurt Browning, the announcer, voiced exactly what I felt by saying something to the effect that these Russians were working at such a high level that they had “created a vortex.”

Cosmic Portals

Throughout history many cosmic portals have opened up. The energetic openings around these time frames created an atmosphere for spiritual awakening, and they brought forth great teachers to guide us. And although comic portals are often associated with specific dates, like with December 21st, 2012, the powerful energy they bring with them that creates the impetus for change and spiritual growth can last for years, decades, or even centuries.

Around 400–500BC the Greek truth-seekers in the West and Buddha in the East brought their new ideas and philosophies to us. 2000 years ago, Jesus appeared with his teachings of love, compassion, and forgiveness. Later on, around 600AD Muhammad came along with his message of unity and that we must show mercy and compassion for all mankind, even the animals.

The years around 1400–600AD offered great opportunities for change. Martin Luther challenged the limitations the Catholic church had put on its devotees, disputed the need for sacrifice to attain salvation, and under this premise broke away from the established church to start a new one.

This Renaissance period brought us many artists whose works could break through the barriers of our hardened hearts, giving us the opportunity to see life and others through a softer lens.

The cosmic portals to the higher dimensions that were created through all these time frames were aimed to help us override our propensity to see ourselves, others, and the world through the limitations and harshness of our 3rd dimensional perceptions.

The energy these portals brought forth was carried forward creating a snowball effect, and although most people at the time did not embrace the changes, new ideas, or philosophies proposed, they are still considered periods of great enlightenment because the impact of these cosmic time frames is still influencing us.

More recently, the powerful cosmic portal openings of the 1960’s and of the Harmonic Convergence of 1987 (which lasted until December 2012) brought impulses to overcome what is negative within us –  individually and as a collective.

This encouraged us to recognize, unearth, and bring to attention what is not of love. The recent focus on addressing the abuse, prejudice, and corruption that has been prevalent in our society is due to this powerful cosmic force.

Even more recently, another major portal opened in December 2012. Many say this portal is ushering in a time called the Shift, and it is aimed to help bring about our and Gais’s Ascensions – a time of great cosmic and conscious awakening for Humanity that was written in the stars.

This cosmic opening brought with it much healing universal light and uniting transformative love. It has ushered in waves of such healing and unifying proportions that more individuals than even feel inspired to embrace what is positive and find their empowerment while turning away from negative and disempowering attitudes.

As a collective, we now not only feel motivated, but obliged, to respond to the plights of any who are disenfranchised and/or who have been victims of unfairness, prejudice, or hate crimes. Humanity is embracing this Shift – one that is written in the stars – we are responding with great aplomb.

This most recent portal opening will continue to shower us with light and love for all, and for everything, including our Planet. It has helped us turn the corner from a society that was based on fear, blame, hate, control, greed, revenge, unfairness, prejudice, inequality, and divisiveness, to one based in love, understanding, compassion, acceptance, sharing, equality, fairness, and unity – for all.

*Life Matrix: Is the lens through which we see and navigate the world. It holds all our underlying perceptions or misperceptions and all our unconscious influences. It supports what we think we need to be, as well as what we think we need to do to uphold our perceptions, whether real or false. (chapter 1)

This article is an expansion of the section “Portals / Vortexes” from chapter 6, Words, Symbols, Rituals, Concepts and Prayers.

 © Rosemary McCarthy, (originally posted October 2016,

updated August 2018).

See here for About Book

here to Buy Book(available in Print and E-book Format (e-book just reduced 40%).

here  to Join my email list for my Free Monthly Publication, or to see list of past ones with various themes

here for my Blog Page – with articles on various subjects related to our personal, collective, and cosmic journeys

here  for my Facebook page. Following my FB page ensures you receive my new blog  articles as posted

You can share this article as long as you include the full copyright message below. If you share through Facebook (link is also below), the message automatically copies.

————

Copyright © 2017, 2018 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. You can reach me at:  rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

 

Keeping our Relationships Strong: Steps to Healing a Broken Relationship:

You can read more about the book this article is based on by clicking on “Book Synopsis” above.

————-

Relationship or marriage crisis or breakdowns occur for many reasons. As family, career, or other interests take precedence, couples who may have once been happy stop putting each other first and listening to each other. Sometimes an affair is the catalyst that brings the relationship to the crisis point, however in this case, or for other reasons, there are usually deeper issues that create the breakdown. Loss of unity of purpose distances couples.

If communication wanes, then the ever-important hashing out of hurts and expectations disappears. Without communication, respect cannot be maintained. For some, one person in the partnership has been ignored for years continuously feeling dejected and has had enough, for other couples one has given up trying to appease their pushy and aggressive partner realizing they don’t have a voice in the relationship.

For others, the couple hasn’t nurtured the relationship enough, and sometimes they never cultivated joy and light-heartedness. It may be that one of them has simply gotten overwhelmed and exhausted in life; this often happens because as a couple, they didn’t address or manage their life properly. Breakdowns are also sometimes fueled by the shoulds in our minds, can be influenced by our extended families, social circles, or communities, as well as by our jobs or careers.

There are as many ways to make relationships work as there are relationships, as there are many reasons relationship breakdown. There are many commonalities to happy relationships where both parties are contented and fulfilled, and there are many commonalities to relationships where there is conflict, or where one or both parties are unhappy.

None of us are perfect, and no relationship is without disagreements and conflict. It is how we treat the other person, react to their personality, strengths, weaknesses, and ways of navigating life, and how we cope with the differences between us and the conflicts that arise that will impact the success, happiness, and longevity of our intimate relationship. We all hold unconscious influences that impact how we deal with others, so to keep our relationship healthy we must be conscious of how our partner internalizes our attitudes, actions, and reactions, as well as how we internalize theirs. There are many ways we can deal with our different personalities and the sensitivities we all have that could create conflict; and there are many ways we can give the relationship a boost to help create a loving, and harmonious home.

We Must Show our Partner that He or She Matters. One of the best ways to show the other they matter to us is to make them feel they are our best friend. To show this, we must communicate with them often, in many ways, and on different levels. A touch, a kind or supporting word, or even sharing the good and bad aspects of our day brings us closer. We must show them they can trust us with their fears, vulnerabilities, and dreams, and we must trust them with ours. We must also carve our “special” time for romance – whatever that means to us. We must let the other know that what he or she feels and has to say matters to us, and that their input into the various aspects of our life together is important. No matter what has happened in our day, we want our partner to feel seen and heard. We also want them to be happy to see us.

We Must Really Listen to Our Partner: It is important to really listen to the words our partner speaks – and to the intention behind the words. And even though we may try to listen attentively, sometimes we still do not really hear what the other are saying. We may also only half listen or become impatient, or tune out if our partner becomes overly emotional, critical, or aggressive. We may also be in denial of a situation that must be addressed, or refuse to hear what the other is saying as doing so would required us making changes we are not prepared to make.

We Must Ensure We Are Heard: Sometimes we are not heard, cannot get our point across, or our partner refuses to listen. We may have differing communication styles and he or she becomes impatient, or they may be loud, controlling, or aggressive and always want their way and are used to bullying us into giving in. This causes us to become frustrated and feel disempowered, and our feelings get buried. When our partner cannot or will not hear us, sometimes we simply have to be strong and state our bottom-lines. However, when doing so we have to say what we want to say calmly and without big emotions. Nonetheless, us finally standing our ground may shock our partner and a disagreement may ensue. When this happens, we need to disengage from the argument. However uncomfortable, facing the issue of not being heard can save the relationship. Not expressing our feelings or preferences, or never giving our point of view will eventually cause a rupture in the relationship, one way or another, and if we wait too long it may not be salvageable. Separations and divorce are way more disruptive and uncomfortable than facing our issues – and we go through it alone. Most of us deep down want our relationships to work, and our partner may surprise us once we get going on healing it. And not only do we end up working through it together, the relationship usually ends up way stronger and more satisfying than it ever was.

Building Trust and Creating Communication With Our Partners: We built trust and create good communication with our partners with how we behave every day: by with attitudes, actions, or inaction; by being open, honest, speaking from the heart, and listening with open hearts to our partners; by allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, forgiving the other, and accepting forgiveness from him or her; and by saying what we mean, meaning what we say, and keeping the promises we have made. The combination of trust and good communication opens the door for us to feel safe within the partnership.

Creating a Safe Haven: Creating a safe haven for each in the partnership to express their fears, disappointments, and vulnerabilities, voice their frustrations, and to share their dreams – without fear of being ridiculed or shamed, goes a long way in creating and maintaining a healthy relationship. Sharing our concerns with our partner is vital, as when our sensitive issues are not voiced or understood by the other, an emotional barrier between us is created. Once a barrier is created it perpetuates itself and the cavern between the two people widens. Unexpressed emotions, fears, vulnerabilities, and unmet frustrations will find their way into other unrelated aspects of daily life, creating more conflict and confusion. A vicious cycle ensues, and unless one or the other addresses the emotional gap, a crisis eventually occurs.

We Must Focus on the Positive Aspects of the Other and the Relationship: Staying focused on the positive aspects of our partner and the relationship is vital to creating and maintaining a healthy relationship. Focusing on the negative aspects of our partner and the life we have created drives us into a downward spiral of negativity. Focusing on the positive aspects invites our relationship to spiral in an upward, uplifting direction. However, remaining positive and focusing on the what is good does not come naturally to many of us. We may have to make an effort at first, but we will soon see the benefits. We may have to dig deep to focus on the positive, and consciously create an atmosphere for the relationship to flourish.

We Must Cultivate Joy and Keep it Light: Fostering joy and allow for light-heartedness in our intimate relationships can waylay conflicts. It is so easy to fall into the trap of allowing the responsibilities of adulthood and family life to sap our joy and keep things serious and heavy. Not only does this bring us down individually, it takes the air out of the relationship. Make time to do things together that bring you both joy, and encourage the other to do the things that brings him or her joy. Plan light-hearted activities either alone, or with family or friends who know how to keep it light and don’t focus on drama. When we have tasted how tuning into joy and keeping things light can make us feel, it encourages us to let things go that we might otherwise take issue with that would create conflict in the relationship.

We Must Keep Healthy Boundaries within the Relationship. To do so we must ensure we are not being overly needy bringing deep emotional hurts from our past into the present; are not falling into passivity giving up making our point or ensuring the other hears us; or become unnecessarily impatient or aggressive not making time to listen to and really hear or understand what the other is feeling or their point of view.

Disagreements and minor conflicts will present themselves in all intimate relationships. However, we must always remember that our partner is doing his or her best, but is likely working within the confines of at least some unconscious influences. We all are. And if there is always conflict and one or the other in the relationship is unhappy, address the situation – either together, or individually if necessary. If our unconscious influences are getting in the way of having a happy and satisfying relationship, address them. When we cannot surmount them alone, we must get help. It is better to deal with what is causing the conflict and/or unhappiness than having to deal with a major relationship breakdown – or even a break-up or divorce. However, even when there is a major breakdown, there is still much we can do to save it.

In Love without Hurt Dr.Steven Stosny tells us that when a relationship has suffered “chronic resentment, anger or abuse, reestablishing a connection is not a fifty-fifty proposition.” (1) He explains that in the beginning, it may be as much as a “ninety-ten proposition” with the perpetrator doing most of the work. This is because it is easier for the one who was the aggressor to heal than the one who was subjected to aggressive attitudes and behaviors. Listed below is Dr. Stosny’s advice for maintaining a healthy relationship and steps to healing a broken one if a crisis occurs. (2)

1) Building Deep Connections: A deep connection to our partner makes both parties and the relationship stronger. We create these connections by how we show the other our love by shared values and a conviction in something larger than ourselves, be it a belief system, a humanitarian concern, or even a sociopolitical viewpoint. We can even choose to feel connected if the other does not, as when we make this mental shift our attitudes and behaviors change to reflect it, and this can elicit change in the other.

2) Lifelines: Couples must create emotional lifelines with each other and keep them open. This vital bond keeps us aligned to what is most important to the other and helps to keep the relationship healthy. He suggests that when we are apart we can regularly envision a “long, flexible lifeline,” like an invisible cord, that connects us and our partner. (3) This keeps us connected and can help the healing when we are annoyed with the other. And the more we imagine this lifeline, the stronger our connection so that no matter what our mood, what we are involved with, or where we are, we feel connected to the other.

3) The Power Love Formula: Dr. Stosny gives us four steps to “the power love formula:” small, everyday things we can do to keep our connection strong and open.

  • a) Acknowledge that our partner is important to us at “four crucial times in the day.”  1) Upon Waking, 2) Leaving the House; 3) Coming Home; 4) Going to Sleep. This acknowledgment can be a loving phrase, a kiss, or even a gentle touch—anything that is done with loving intention and conveys our love to the other.
  • b) Give “six hugs per day, holding each for six seconds.” Stosny explains that adopting this “six-by-six” formula of hugging and holding the other “in a full body embrace,” will override any physical distance couples may feel in their relationships. (5) As touching usually ceases at a certain point when one partner starts to feel unloved fueling a downward spiral, we have to rekindle the spark. He warns us though that we may have to fake it at first, as it will not feel natural to want to lovingly touch someone we are resentful of or angry with. Hugs not only help our relationship they increase serotonin levels and therefore our general feelings of emotional well-being, which can allow us to be more forgiving of and open to our partner.
  • c) Contract to love our partner: When we have lost the loving feeling, Dr. Stosny suggests we write and sign a contract every day at the same time of the day with a list declaring “how I will show my love for you everyday.” (6) It should be formal, encompassing the present and the future, but not long or complicated. He suggests that we write it based on the idea that if I love him/her, I would …. We then write out the details of how we have decided to show our partners how we love them in both the present and future.
  • d) Embrace the four Rs when we slip up: Breaking habits or letting go of resentments does not happen overnight. We will err and forget our promises and sometimes succumb to the habitual attitudes deep hurts encourage us to act upon. In Dr. Stosny’s program, he proposes that we embrace the four Rs when we succumb to old habits or fall prey to emotional outbursts.

The four R’s to use after we have slipped up in our relationship:

  1. Recover: Once we realize we have erred, we need to remind our self of our promises made and get our attitudes under control. If this happens only after the fact and we cannot talk to our partner, we can try to rebuild our connection by using our lifelines and send loving, positive thoughts to our partner.
  2. Repair: Make amends with our partner. If they reject our efforts, we need to try again and again, until they forgive us. The entire healing process takes time, so we must remain mindful that “the power lies in trying.” (7) Even though we might feel like retreating when our apologies are rejected, we must continue to try.
  3. Receive: We must be willing to receive the other’s attempts at repair, because at this point, it is not about who did what to whom. Stosny says that all attempts to repair are stepping-stones to a healthy relationship, and in that spirit, our “licence to pout and sulk is hereby suspended.” (8) He tells us to expect to be successful at rebuilding! Remembering that the ultimate goal is rebuilding the relationship will make accepting repair attempts easier.
  4. Reconnect: When feeling unloved or hurt, we always need to ask ourselves what a loving, invested partner would do. Even if our partner does not respond in the ways we want, we can uphold the spirit of our final goals: rebuilding connections, feeling love again, and creating a happy, healthy, and satisfying relationship.

Even though Dr. Stosny concurs with spiritual concepts that we are all ultimately responsible for our feelings and our happiness, he also puts forth that when one partner’s attitudes have not been loving or compassionate, the relationship itself has suffered. Being an entity in itself the relationship needs healing, hence the necessity for steps to repair it.

This article is an expansion of the sub- section “Marriage Crisis: Breakdowns, Breaking Points, and Healing” from the “Couples” section of chapter 5, Relationships.

 © Rosemary McCarthy, (originally posted October 2016,

updated April 2017)

You can access more articles on various subjects related to our personal, collective, and cosmic journeys through “View Archives” on the “Home Page.”

You can share this article with others using the © message below. When sharing through Facebook (link is below), the message automatically copies.

Below is a peek into a bit more in the book:

The truth of who we are lies quietly in wait just below the surface of any false illusions we may have inadvertently constructed. (Introduction).

Whether positive or negative, our unconscious beliefs act upon us without our consent, or real knowledge of why. (Chapter 1, Why We Are the Way We Are)

We were not sent away by a vengeful God, but as we bough into the ego or Satan’s deception that we had broken our connection to our Source, we were filled with remorse, guilt, and fear. Fear of retribution and the projection of that fear with its ensuing shame and guilt into judgment of others, is the basis of the human predicament. (Chapter 1)

Powerful shifts will occur in us when we acknowledge the truth of who we are, while at the same time reconcile the truth of who we are being. (Chapter 2, Universal Laws / Kingdom Principles)

Our capacity to love others is in direct relationship to how much we love ourselves. (Chapter 3, What We Can Do About It)

Don’t wallow in what you have or haven’t done—don’t get stuck in the darkness. (Chapter 4, Along the Way)

How we choose to live life “in the meantime” will likely be the deciding factor to our happiness, because most of our life is spent in the meantime. (Chapter 4).

The need to fill a void within ourselves manifests itself in the demands we put on others or the incessant striving for material possessions and status.  (Chapter 5, Relationships)

We yearn for intimacy, but the playing out of our unconscious influences drives us apart. Power struggles develop as we try to uphold our need for love and intimacy, while our Protective Mechanisms create boundaries around inner our world.   (Chapter 5).

Many have confused God’s revenge with the karmic Law of Balance and that of Cause and Effect playing out in our lives. (Chapter 6, Words, Symbols, Rituals, Concepts, Prayers).

Free will is our inheritance. However, we are not exercising true free will if we live under the tutelage of unconscious influences. (Chapter 6).

The Masters were not under the laws of the physical world, nor are we when we partner up with them, Spirit, God, or our higher Self, or invoke any who have attained those higher states. (Chapter 6).

We can reconcile our apparent relationship with extra-terrestrials with our belief systems. (Chapter 7, Science).

The electromagnetic fields we create from our heart chakras are at least forty times stronger than those created from our brains. (Christiane Northrup) (Chapter 7) ,

Traumatic situations are held in our cellular memory until they are dealt with: they sit there like open doors for ailments. (Chapter 8, Health and Healing; Death and Dying).

Our need to reconcile what we put upon the Indigenous peoples is in direct relationship to our country’s successful advancements. (Chapter 9, The Planet and Abundance)

Our planet is a living, breathing organism … and just like us she has to cleanse herself of toxins – the physical and emotional abuses we have put upon her. (Chapter 9).

At levels beyond our awareness we chose to be here at this time of ‘The Shift’ to help bring about our and Gais’s Ascensions. (Chapter 10, Ascension).

Hope is the harbinger that will keep that vibration pointed to where a brighter world may flourish. It is hope that will anchor in Ascension. (Chapter 11, The Future).

The Importance of Embracing Unity Consciousness (Conclusion).

—————–

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain. and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. You can reach me at: rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

Endnotes

(1) Steven Stosny, Love without Hurt (Philadelphia, PA: Da Capo Press, 2008), 259.

(2) Ibid., 260-7.

(3) Ibid., 261

(4) Ibid., 262

(5) Ibid., 263

(6) Ibid., 265

(7) Ibid., 266

(8) Ibid.

Substances and Practices that Affect Our Bodies

You can read more about the book this is based on by clicking on “Book Synopsis” above.

It is no secret that toxins in our air and water and over-ingesting in refined foods adversely affect our health, but there are many other substances, foods, and practices that are now being brought to the forefront because they give us pain, digestive difficulties, and/or adversely affect our health in many ways. Here are some of those substances and their adverse effects.

Gluten: In his article “Why Is Wheat Gluten Disorder on the Rise?” Joseph Mercola tells us that gluten intolerance is a condition where gluten found in foods cannot be properly assimilated. He explains that it is “a protein found in wheat, rye and barley. The undigested protein triggers the immune system to attack the lining of the small intestine, causing diarrhea, nausea and abdominal pain.” He says that this rise in gluten intolerance is likely due to dramatic diet changes that have occurred since the ’50s. (1) Gluten can also be created as we prepare foods, such as when we mash potatoes

 

Wheat: Even though gluten is found in other foods, wheat seems to be the main food-product giving us problems. I remember years ago being told that the problem with wheat today, say compared to what the ancient Egyptians grew, is that it has been so genetically modified that not only are its components now altered, but its growth has also become stunted. Wheat originally grew much taller and was able to reach high up in the sky and open itself up to large amounts of sunlight. This tall growth also allowed for more insects and bees that pollinate to find space to do so, while at the same time the tall stems blowing in the wind knocked off insect pests. This is one of the reasons many people are now switching to ancient grains, such as quinoa, which have been less modified from their original structure.

Meat and Animal ProductsThe meat-vegetarian divide has existed for a long time. People choose to become vegetarians (or vegans) for many different reasons, including health, spiritual motivations, animal-rights concerns, to benefit the Planet, or to uphold ethical principles. That is not to say that meat eaters are not concerned with some of the same issues as are vegetarians or vegans; they may just be approaching the issues in a different way. Some meat products have been proven to be filled with hormones and synthetic enhancers, and the same has been revealed about dairy, produce, and grain products―although this is now changing. Regardless of which side of the camp you sit on, it is important to remember that our return to wholeness advocates that love, compassion, and understanding trump any attitudes of judgment or the demeaning or criticizing of others for their habits or values—even if we believe our values endorse more spiritual or ethical principles.

Genetically Modified Organisms: GMOs are foods or crops that have been manipulated in laboratories to develop supposedly better attributes, such as increased yields, better nutritional content, and more resistance to bacteria and insects. They exist in all areas of our food groups. Experts disagree over the impact they have on our health, so it is advisable to err on the side of caution and aim to consume foods in their most original and natural form. Many also believe that GMOs negatively impact our natural ecological system as the tampering of seeds, plants, and nature-driven farming processes affect pollinators―all of which in turn affect our future and that of the Planet. Vandana Shiva, a scientist and philosopher, tells us in an interview with Bill Moyers that a huge socioeconomic problem has occurred in India because there is a controlled monopoly in rice-seed sales for the everyday farmer to the extent that all the seeds they have access to have been severely manipulated and the farmers themselves have no control over this (2). We are also now genetically engineering crops so that they are tolerant of herbicides. In the past few years soybeans have been modified to withstand glyphosate, the component of a popular herbicide that kills the weeds but allows the surrounding plants to survive. Although this is a helpful for the farmers and their crop yields, it is a double-whammy against our health and the environment: the product is genetically modified and the herbicide gets into our soil.

Mercury: It is now understood that the amount of mercury in our bodies is rising, and it is not just from old fillings and eating fish. The National Research Council of the National Academies has found that the highest concentration of mercury comes from “coal combustion, waste incineration, chlor-alkali plants, and metal processing … and [is] easily volatized to the atmosphere, where it is distributed on a global scale.” Too much mercury in our systems can have negative effects on our nervous systems, kidneys, and lungs. (3)

Fluoride: The common tap water that most of us drink in Canada and the U.S. is fluoridated to protect the health of our teeth, but there is widespread disagreement about its effectiveness. In an interview entitled “Warning: This Daily Habit Is Damaging Your Bones, Brain, Kidneys, and Thyroid,” Paul Connett says that studies show the teeth of children who drink fluoridated water are no healthier than those who do not, and that fluoride is harmful. He also tells us that Europeans do not fluoridate their water and in most cases their teeth are healthier than North Americans. Connett recommends drinking filtered water whenever possible and suggests that we brush our teeth with a fluoride toothpaste. (4)

Our bodies all respond differently to the toxins in our air and water as well as to all of the 20th century additions, processing, and modifications to what we put on or into our bodies. Even so, one way or another they still play a major role in many of our health issues. Therefore we must be judicious in examining and questioning what is now considered the norm as well as new products or processes being promoted to us―especially by those making profit from them. And as we continue to raise our vibrations our body’s energetic patterning changes and it will more strongly reject unhealthy, non-pure substances becoming even less tolerant of toxins, and low-energy, modified, processed, and sugar and hormone-ridden foods.

Rosemary McCarthy, October 2016

(This article is based on and an expansion to the section “Substances / Practices / Choices that Negatively Affect our Bodies” from chapter 8).

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. However, I would appreciate if you would inform me of where or to whom it has been shared, using email rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly!

Endnotes

(1) Joseph Mercola, “Why Is Wheat Gluten Disorder on the Rise?,” July 23, 2009, http:// articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2009/07/23/Why-is-Wheat-Gluten-Disorderon-the-Rise.aspx.

(2) Vandana Shiva, “The Problem with Genetically Modified Seeds,” Moyers & Company, PBS, July 13, 2012, http://billmoyers.com/segment/vandana-shiva-on-the-problem-with-genetically-modified-seeds/.

(3) National Research Council, Global Sources of Local Pollution: An Assessment of Long-Range Transport of Key Air Pollutants to and from the United States (Washington, DC: National Academies Press, 2010), 97–101.

(4) Paul Connett, “Warning: This Daily Habit is Damaging Your Bones, Brain, Kidneys, and Thyroid,” interview by Joseph Mercola, July 1, 2010, http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2010/07/01/paul-connett-interview.aspx.

Aids to Overcoming Our Issues

You can read more about the book this is based on by clicking on “Book Synopsis” above.

We can rise above our issues. There are many steps we can take to overcoming unhappiness, frustration, inertia, limitation, addiction, or anything else that is keeping us from becoming our Best Self.

To do so, however, requires being proactive and taking the necessary steps—even if it is just making life lists or lists to help us find or reconnect to our passions. And it is important to match the type of problem with the correct approach. Lofty spiritual concepts cannot address deeply entrenched issues or addictions. We must use the appropriate tool geared towards the specific problem. Below is a recap of some of the suggestions I have discussed in the book.

  • Acknowledge what is making you feel bad by writing it down or journaling about it. This will give your feelings a voice, help you connect to the main issue, and possibly give you insight into how to proceed.
  • Make life lists and read them diligently morning and evening, and if possible keep them handy so you can read them throughout day (Worksheet 14 in the book guides us with various helpful lists).
  • Do or redo any of my worksheets that will help you get to the bottom of any underlying misperception that may be holding you down. (These are found at the back of the book and can be downloaded from this website’s link “Downloads” using the associated code found at the back of the book).
  • Use affirmations daily. You can use any I have mentioned in the book or make up your own.
  • Get help with any issues in your life―NOW! If you can’t seem to conquer your serious issues or addictions yourself, get personal counselling, join a workshop, church group, or attend the appropriate self-help group. Do not be afraid to open up to those trained to help unravel what is keeping you from becoming your Best Self. Our peace and happiness lies in uncovering what brought about our addiction, working to release its hold on us, understanding our triggers, and eventually being able to replace behaviors that affect us negatively with those that affect us positively.
  • Buy/rent/borrow material you are drawn to: books, CD’s, DVD’s, or whatever you are drawn to or just seems to cross your path.
  • Cultivate joy. Take time to engage in what makes you feel alive. Immerse yourself in nature or your passion, take up a new hobby, or join a class to learn something you’ve always wanted to.
  • Take up a centering practice like yoga, meditation, Tai Chi, daily prayer, or spend extra time in nature; join a like-minded group or church that supports where you are spiritually.
  • Make necessary life changes. If your current circumstances are hindering you from overcoming what is keeping you down, be it friends, your job, or where you live. Make the changes!
  • Yell at God or the Universe―if you must. Sometimes we get so stuck in life, confused, and/or unsure of which direction to take that we have to aggressively ask for help in getting out from under. And as inertia, confusion, or uncertainty gives mixed messages to Spirit what we send out as requests does not get through clearly and we then receive mixed messages from the Universe, further adding to our confusion. I discuss in chapter 4, “Along the Way,” I succumbed to yelling at Spirit, God, the Universe (or whoever was listening) around the beginning of 2012 because I had this burning need/desire to share what was rumbling around inside of me, but it had no focus. It was shortly thereafter that I was directed to people and meditations that helped get me unstuck and on track to putting this book together.

Rosemary McCarthy, November, 2016

This article is based on and an expansion of the section “Steps to Overcoming Unhappiness, Frustration, Inertia, Limitation, or Addictionin the Conclusion – a recap of many concepts discussed in Part I of the book.

You can share this article with others using the © message below. When sharing through Facebook (link is below), the message automatically copies.

Below is a peek into a few other concepts in the book:

Improving our attitudes helps change the world, as every shift in attitude affects the vibration of the Planet as a whole. (Introduction).

Our capacity to love others is in direct relationship to how much we love ourselves. (Chapter 3, What We Can Do About It)

Our Relationships Are Pre-set Soul Contracts: The highest purpose of our relationships is to work through our unconscious influences: our fears, neediness, vulnerabilities, misperceptions, and false notions about love. They are set up to bring these misalignments from our True Self to the surface – for healing. This is why we find our close relationships so difficult.  (Chapter 5, Relationships)

We can reconcile our apparent relationship with extra-terrestrials with our belief systems. (Chapter 7, Science).

The electromagnetic fields we create from our heart chakras are at least forty times stronger than those created from our brains. (Chapter 8, Health and Healing; Death and Dying).

Our planet is a living, breathing organism … and just like us she has to cleanse herself of toxins – the physical and emotional toxins we have put upon her. (Chapter 9, The Planet and Abundance).

At levels beyond our awareness we chose to be here at this time of ‘The Shift’ to help bring about our and Gais’s Ascensions. (Chapter 10, Ascension).

The Importance of Embracing Unity Consciousness (Conclusion).

—————–

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. You can contact me at: rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

Further Understanding Karma

Karma is the term used by most Eastern philosophies. The Law of Cause and Effect and the Law of Balance (that I have put forth in chapter 2) are simply different and more specific ways of explaining karma.

Many have confused God’s revenge with the karmic Laws of Balance and of Cause and Effect playing out in our lives.

Proponents who say that karma affects our lives suggest that we accrue either good or bad karma by our attitudes and behaviors and that an accumulation of good karma allows for more positive life experiences and that of bad karma will lead to more negative life experiences.

We create good karma through positive, loving, accepting, and life-affirming attitudes and behaviors towards others. In how we deal with our situations at hand. Anyway we connect to or expresse our Onesness.

We create bad karma through negative, harsh, judgmental, and disempowering attitudes and behaviors towards others and how we handle situations.

It is also believed that adding to our bank of good karma can help neutralize the effects of bad karma. And we can clear bad karma by embracing attitudes and actions that deal positively and lovingly with the world around us and our life circumstances.

When people give us a hard time or unpleasant things happen to us, we are often frustrated, angry, or resentful of our circumstances. We feel like a victim or blame God.

But there are many reasons bad things happen to us. We may be inviting these experiences in through what is held in our Life Matrix (definition below). We might be clearing a karmic debt, or simply be caught in the crossfire of bad situations of what others are doing.

We can change what we invite into our sphere as well as clear our karmic debts by how we address current situations and behave towards others and the world.

Whatever is happening in our lives and no matter why, we can clear bad karma or add to our bank of good karma by our attitudes and behaviors surrounding the situation. We need not know why a particular event happened, we just have to deal positively with what presents itself now.

From her Christian perspective, Joyce Meyer says that we “add to our bank of good things to come” by forgiving, being kind, or doing the right thing. This is simply another way of explaining good karma.

However, at some level, we are usually at the cause of our current experiences, and at the deepest level we are also at the cause of what our soul’s journey dictates. Karma is also played out within our many lives through reincarnation. (My article on Reincarnation explains this and our soul’s journey more fully. You can find it here).

If we accumulate bad karma within one lifetime, at some point these debts will have to be cleared. For example, if someone has or is mistreating us, this may have been a current or past-life karmic debt that we incurred. We may have mistreated that person badly in a past life.

If we accumulate good karma in any lifetime, it will be reflected in one of the next ones. If someone is very kind or helpful to us in this lifetime it may be repayment for kindnesses we afforded them, or others, in our past life.

The Laws of Cause and Effect and of Balance are also in effect throughout our soul’s whole journey. Challenges and mistreatments may also be forgiveness lessons we chose to learn this lifetime and the other person may be fulfilling their function in our soul’s life plan.

 

 

When we deal with negative situations peacefully, we pay off our karmic debts surrounding the related issues, our vibrational makeup shifts and the issues disappear from our Life Matrix. Otherwise they remain within our emotional make-up and affect our life.

For example, until we address our tendency toward, say neediness, issues that will bring our neediness to the surface will keep showing up in our life.

(Life Matrix: Is the lens through which we see and navigate the world. It holds all our underlying perceptions or misperceptions and all our unconscious influences. It supports what we think we need to be, as well as what we think we need to do to uphold our perceptions, whether real or false.

© Rosemary McCarthy, October, 2016, updated August 2018

See here for my Blog Page – with articles on various subjects related to our personal, collective, and cosmic journeys.

here  to Join my Free Monthly Publication, or to see list of past ones with various themes.

here  for my Facebook page. Following my FB page ensures you receive my new blog articles as posted.

here for About Book

here to Buy Book(available in Print and E-book Format (e-book just reduced 40%).

You can share this article as long as you include the full copyright message below. If you share through Facebook (link is also below), the message automatically copies.

—————-

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. However, I would appreciate if you would inform me of where or to whom it has been shared, using email rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

The Tao Birthed Us and Looks After Us

To see updated version, click here

We all came here in harmony from Oneness, all perfect, to be loved and nourished, and will return one day unconditionally loved—just as we are. In Stephen Mitchell’s translation of the Tao Te Ching we are told:

Every being in the universe

is an expression of the Tao.

It springs into existence,

unconscious, perfect, free,

takes on a physical body,

lets circumstance complete it.

… … … …

The Tao gives birth to all beings,

nourishes them, maintains them,

cares for them, comforts them, protects them,

takes them back to itself,

creating without possessing,

acting without expecting,

guiding without interfering.(1)

Resolving our conflicts and making peace with our differences and the resulting judgments that stem from these – whether with individuals or groups of people – allows us to move closer to our wholeness, align with our godliness, and encourages us all to embrace the Oneness we all share.

For those of us with issues toward anybody different than us, whether because of race, creed, social status, or sexual preference, we have an opportunity to forgive ourselves for judging and for not seeing them as the masters intended us to see our brothers and sisters, namely, as perfect children of God.

For those of us who are being judged and have or are living with the pain and unfairness of prejudice, we have the opportunity to forgive those who judge, condemn, or create the inequalities we are enduring or have had to endure.

When our beliefs come from the narrow interpretations of scriptural writings, like when they purport that homosexuality is a sin, and we allow those beliefs to override compassion, unconditional love, and  full acceptance of others and who they are being, we are not actually practicing our godliness or really adhering to the core message of our  belief systems.

This article is an expansion of the section “Homosexuality” in chapter 5, “Relationships” from Your Journey to Peace, Bridging the Gap Between Religion, Spirituality, Psychology, and Science (more info below).

Notation:

(1) Stephen Mitchell, trans., Tao Te Ching (New York: HarperCollins, 2006), 51.

Rosemary McCarthy, October 2016,

updated, January 2018

Book Synopsis is found at:  https://yourjourneytopeace.com/book-synopsis/

Available in print and e-book formats; Purchase Link found at: https://yourjourneytopeace.com/the-book-store/

You can access more blog articles on various subjects related to our personal, collective, and cosmic journeys at: https://yourjourneytopeace.com/blog/

To receive the new blogs as soon as they are posted follow the book’s Facebook Page (link is below).

You can share this article as long as you include the copyright message below. If you share through Facebook the message will automatically copy.

——————

Copyright © 2016 by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. However, I would appreciate if you would inform me of where or to whom it has been shared, using email rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

 

How Aggressive, Passive, and Limiting Attitudes and Behaviors Affect Us

We have peace and happiness when we are connected to our True Self. Being connected to our True Self allows us to feel empowered and become our Best Self.

We all have differing personalities, strengths, and weaknesses that are expressed in how we navigate the various aspects of our life, and when connected to our True Self we live in harmony with others – we don’t allow these differences to create conflict.

Many of us became disconnected from our True Self because we developed unconscious influences that created misperceptions about who we truly are, and who others truly are.

These misperceptions are derived from being witness to or from experiences we had within our familial, cultural, or social backgrounds, causing conflict within our beings.

Being under the tutelage of these unconscious influences we react in ways that not only undermine us becoming our Best Self, but also affects our relationships with others. Life becomes more difficult than it could be.

Being disconnected from our True Self we do not feel empowered to create the life we want. We often believe how we behave and our ways of reacting to others or situations are attempts to gain authority over our lives, but sometimes they are feeble attempts to counteract feelings of disempowerment.

Most of us are somewhat disconnected to our True Self. We may feel lonely, depressed, left out, disadvanted, or disemp0wered in someway. So rather than cut each other down we must move towards supporting each other.

Unconscious influences show up in selfish, aggressive, passive, or limiting attitudes, and the behaviors these engender. (They also show up in other ways, such as with dysfunctions and addictions, but I am not addressing those here. I am focusing on every-day attitudes and their behaviors that we can more easily choose to change once we understand them). Below are some examples.

Ambition, Success, Power, Pride, and Greed―are all attitudes that we can fall prey to, but that can easily derail our lives if not kept in check.

Ambition, in and of itself, is not a bad quality. Pure aspirations from our souls’ yearning bring harmony into our beings and ultimately direct us toward fulfilling lives. However, ambition can blind us to realities and distance us from those we love.

Success often follows ambition and makes us feel fulfilled for our efforts. However, we must be wary of the allure of what comes with success and the power it brings with it.

Power brings with it authority, and that responsibility must be handled with honor and integrity―not wielded over others, otherwise we will create disharmony for others, and ultimately, our self.

Pride can prevent us from expanding into all that we can be, as it can cause us to become myopic in our views. It may also erect emotional boundaries that can distance us from others.

Greed sets up limiting vibrations about abundance as it carries an underlying belief in the lack.

All these attitudes can derail our successes or alienate us from others.

Aggressive Behaviors and Attitudes: Control, Manipulation, Criticism, Bullying, and Impatienceare protective devices whose intent is to make us feel powerful, but as they come from a position of weakness they further lower our sense of self-worth.

Control: The most pervasive form of Humanity’s protective devices, control gives us a false sense of power over our lives, as well as on those we attempt to wield it over. Most controllers are quite apt to use other techniques to maintain their sense of power.

Manipulation: A controller often resorts to underhanded, manipulative tactics to influence others or situations to get their own way, either through aggressive or passive-aggressive tactics.

Criticism: Most often recognized immediately as blatant disapproval usually accompanies it, criticism can also be masked as someone claiming to help us see or do something better and in their way.

Bullying: An aggressive approach used by those trying to satisfy their injured self-esteem, bullies attempt to scare or control their victims, often intentionally hurting them. They frequently use escalating tactics.

Impatience: A weakness that stems from a lack of knowing that all is well, the person is often irritated with everyone and everything, usually stemmed from growing up in an atmosphere of agitation, anxiety, intolerance, or criticism.

Passive Attitudes and Behaviors: Helplessness, Victim Mentalities, and Passive-Aggressiveness―come about because of low self-esteem and fear of failure. When we fall prey to using passive attitudes and behaviors to counteract our fears or others’ aggressive tendencies, we are recoiling from our inner power base and its ability to empower us.

Instead of using aggressive techniques to get what we want or lashing out to avoid hurt or pain, our personalities combined with our childhood experiences influence us to react passively to real or imagined onslaughts by turning our emotions inward.

Helplessness usually comes about because we have never been encouraged in life or have been criticized and belittled to such an extent that we have given up trying. Lacking self-confidence, one of the best remedies for helplessness is trying new things.

A few years ago I heard Dennis DeYoung from the band Styx say at one of his concerts that “the reason people like me are doing well and are successful is mostly because we failed and got back up and tried again and again, many, many times,” and that failures are often great classrooms of learning. We have to fight our urge to feel helpless when we fail. .1

Victim mentalities develop when we are ineffective at getting what we want and finding our own empowerment. Feeling frustrated, we may adopt responses whereby we resort to blaming our situations on others or the world.

Passive-aggressiveness occurs when we feel helpless, victimized, or simply lack the self-esteem to speak up for ourselves. To be heard or get what we want we resort to subtle, non-aggressive tactics such as sad or long faces, deep sighs, and silent treatments.

Behaviors that can be Aggressive and/or Passive: Self-Indulgence, Envy/Jealousy, and Defensiveness―are attempts to placate our neediness, which do nothing to increase our self-esteem and thereby keep us in a negative mind-set.

Self-indulgence is the placating of our neediness. This encourages us to feel sorry for ourselves. Wallowing in our own issues keeps us stuck in our problems, and we are blinded to the possibilities of our lives.

Envy and Jealousy keep us in a negative frame of mind because they focus on what we lack, as our minds are filled with what another has. We are then not focusing our attention on how to get what we want, and the vibration of discontent will not invite our desires into our sphere.

Defensiveness comes into play when we are invested in being right, want to make the other feel wrong, or feel the need to protect and uphold our position on the subject at hand.

Limiting Attitudes: Minimalist Tendencies and Small-Mindedness―develop because we feel we are not deserving enough, or believe there is not enough love or goods to go around.

Minimalist tendencies keep us in limitation. They develop because we believe there is not enough of whatever we feel we are lacking, whether love or goods, to go around. Focusing on only what we have at the moment and not entertaining the possibility of having more in the future cuts off our connection to better circumstances, both personally and financially.

Small-mindedness plays out as our focusing mainly on the limited or minute details of events or living instead of on the bigger picture. This holds us to a limited view of life, leaving no room for hope of a future with a wider range of possibilities.

When we operate within limiting attitudes, we develop tunnel vision. When we drop minimalist or small-minded tendencies, our beings can then open up to all the potential the Universe holds for us.

Law of Expansion - Universal Law 6 (of 6)

We are either aligned with our True Self, or we are misaligned.  A Course in Miracles tells us we are either acting out of love, or out of fear.

All expressions of love make us feel good, encourage and uplift others, and create harmony in our lives.

All expressions of fear, such as anger, revenge, greed, cruelty, etc., may make us feel good in the moment, but act to distrance us from our True Self and ultimately do not serve us.

As our unconscious influences keep us disconnected from our True Self, to find peace within ourselves, empowerment in our lives, and harmony with others we have to override them so that we can rekindle that connection.

We have to break through the barriers of our unconscious influences and their misperceptions, and the attitudes, reactions, and behaviors they engender that keep us disconnected from the love within our True Self.

Self-examination helps us to unearth the causes of any aggressive, passive, and limiting attitudes and behaviors that keep us from being our Best Self and free from conflict with those around us.

However, when looking at our past or current errors in perception of who we truly are and who others are, we must always be on guard against self-condemnation. We must remember:

The purpose of self-examination is not to make ourselves feel wrong

but to uncover and release what is blocking

our connection to our True Self.

© Rosemary McCarthy, (originally posted October 2016,

updated August 2018).

See here for my Blog Page – with articles on various subjects related to our personal, collective, and cosmic journeys, or by scrolling down to View Archives” on the “Home Page” of this website.

here for About Book

here to Buy Book(available in Print and E-book Format (e-book just reduced 40%).

here  for my Facebook page. Following my FB page ensures you receive my new blog  articles as posted

here  to Join my Free Monthly Publication, or to see list of past ones with various themes

You can share this article as long as you include the full copyright message below. If you share through Facebook (link is also below), the message automatically copies.

———–

Copyright © 2016, by Rosemary McCarthy. All rights Reserved. You may only copy, share and distribute this article provided that the content is copied in its entirety, is unaltered, and is distributed freely and for no monetary or personal gain, and that this copyright notice and the link for the article and the website www.yourjourneytopeace.com are included. You can contact me at: rosemary@yourjourneytopeace.com. Blessings, and thank you kindly.

Endnote

1 Dennis de Young, singer from the band Styx, performed at Bourbon Street, Ste. Adele, Quebec, June 23, 2007.